Scuderia Hanseat: Discofox in hell..

Many of you know that my most beloved Nordschleife, is nicknamed „green hell“. Now I don’t know about you, but I used to think this highly unjust, instead of hell, it was „not quite so green“ heaven for me.

“Joy of driving”: are they joking?PHohoho! How naive! And if you believe the name “green“: shame on you too! Because last week, at the Driving school of “Scuderia Hanseat“ on Nuerburgring we encountered the wettest, coldest, foggiest, unfriendly, slippery May days in History (ever!!!!). Plus it was snowing! Wet, white, wretched hell!
This unfortunately is not some remote faraway place like japan, its here and now, it´s Eiffel!
Old”Fahrerlager” in snowstorm…

Everyone participating under these circumstances should rightfully declared to be mad, and those, stupid enough to drive an old car should be admitted to a luny asylum, without delay.

This is Start and Finish of Grand Prix Track, full of mad people!

But let me start at the beginning: “Scuderia Hanseat“ is best described as a Dancing Driving school, teaching you how to Discofox on Nordschleife. The (longest, most dangerous, beautiful, blabla and so on) Track is divided in 12 sections, which are taught and explained separately. It‘s cool as you get to walk on this famous bit of Tarmac, and you can appreciate the differences in altitude, grip and width closely.The Instructors show you the IDEAL LINE, not Race line, in most turns and corners. After two and a half days of early rising and going to bed late, they go and sit in their respective wet and freezing corners to see each participant dance past and mark him from 1 (best) to 10 (impossibly bad), according to his precision, speed, ability to handle his car. Just like in a proper Dancing Tournament. If you like Discofox ( I obviously do and so do hundreds of other people out there) its very very nice, and one of the safest ways to learn your way around Nuerburgring. 300 cars and even more people, from all over the world are divided in 12 groups (like Skischool, summercamp or other grown up experiences), and most people keep coming back for more…

I had been there before and was really looking forward to these three days in the Eiffel, training for it on Nordschleife with my fantastic Teacher and famous racer Claudia Hürtgen as often as I could. As it turned out my Kobold Racer was set up to low , just returning from the tracks at the Tour Auto and therefore swimming in high speed corners, like Fuchsröhre, Schwedenkreuz or Pflanzgarten 2. (rendering the car unmanageble for me) My friends from Raedersport, helped, via telephone instructions from Marc and translations from Claudia to relieve the Problem somehow, but high speed was still very scary and full speed not possible. So the relapse of arctic winter was almost fine by me, had it not been for water leaping into my car, windows continuously fogging over, wipers not strong enough to remove the layer of grime building up on my screen, no ESP, no ABS, no steering assistance and my radiator working only when the engine was warm. (which was not often during the first day.)

This is what I see in my Rear view mirror.
Windows are closed: car stays half dry and screen is fogged, windows stays open: screen is not totally fogged and car is all wet. What’s a woman to do?

This first day, the fog on the Grand prix Track was so thick the 150 m Break sign only became visible as we drove past it and it was extremely wet and slippery. And you know what? I loved it! My little Avon Tyres cut through the water much better than big modern ones and the grip of my car was fantastic. I managed to overtake a 4 wheel drive Porsche (997) and the kind (and funny) person driving it, told me later he had problem following me. Yet best of all: When you drive in thick fog not seeing the other cars you delude yourself of being extremely fast and first!


I had a blast driving in the rain on the Grand prix track that day, but unfortunately they pulled us in very quickly and the rest of the day we did not get to drive enough, due to Conditions and the rather large number of people in our group.

Entrance to Hatzenbach turn: are you tempted?

Next day the fog had thankfully lifted, but it nevertheless rained all day, meaning we learned tons but also meaning wet and cold feet, bad mood, sitting in a humid car waiting, no music, no car magazine, hungry, homesick, without family, not sure about friends uuaaaahhhhhh… ( I HAVE to write this, just in case family reads this and thinks is just pleasure, no learning..)

Does this look uninviting to you? Good, you´re normal!
wet, wet wet!
“Steilstrecke”: we didn´t, but they used to race on this, crazy people!!!
The third and last day our faith had turned.

The track was dry and our first tour covered the entire Nordschleife behind a very experienced and good Instructor who let us fly across in a very very pretty rhythm (meaning fast for my car and still handsome for the fast modern ones..) Now you probably want to know how Kobold and I performed at the final exam? I don´t know how it happened but my alter ego took over the steering wheel (I´m ashamed to admit, but my alter ego is an old bloodthirsty disgusting Crocodile, with a knife the seize of a sword between its fangs, ask my children!). The mean three of us (Kobold, crocodile and me) had enormous fun, catching up with, chasing a poor Caterham in front of us. I have never had so much fun on Nordschleife and it showed in our results: 2nd place in our group and Ladies Cup. Great achievement!

Eiffel showing its beautiful face only at the last morning

But the greatest reward for all the hours spend training last year and all the hours suffering this year was this last ride itself, but that is difficult to explain and a REALLY long story.
Next week no more cars, back to warming hearth and homely heaven: I promise!

P.S. If you don´t believe me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVgiIQg5zps
Kobold is featured, but towards the end of this nice little film.

22 Comments

  1. Jean François P says:

    I began to be impatient to read the fabulous Story about Your Nordchleife examination …
    For good ,You are classified as the most Passionnate “Femme au foyer”, and “The world champion Driver of vacuum cleaner “( wet version) CONGRATULATION !!!
    Most of people don’t like rain , I think that your own Happiness is always more beautiful in bad weather than under the sun of Tropics …
    It is not dilute by the environment .

    How to transform a hell weather in a Heaven experience ! be passionate ,be positive !!!

    You are mad , I understand ,me too

    What do you think about ?

    Kind Regards .JF Madman

  2. Arneyb says:

    You did it ! Fantastic description of how f****cking cold and how f****cking wet it was. Your way of driving was wonderful and I couldnt follow You in the wet as well. You deserve that trophys and I believe a “Ladys Cup” is more or less a discrimination for Your skill.

    I think now it is time for the community to get You a racers nickname. Ohter guys (for some reasons) wear nicknames like “Raingod”, “Hitman”, “Ludwig van” or even “Striezel” !!!
    So here is my proposal for You. Lets call her:
    “G-Spot Spangenberg”
    @all: more ideas welcome
    BR “Mutter”

  3. mealsandwheels says:

    Hello JF Madman. It took a while getting over the weather trauma to write this post. The next ones will be quicker! Are you mad enough to come to join us next time? its time for you to drive on the (still) most beautiful track in the world!!! Come on!

  4. mealsandwheels says:

    Dear Arneyb. I´m really not sooo suer about youre nicknames….. What´s BR”Mutter”?

  5. mealsandwheels says:

    Dear Arneyb. I´m really not sooo sure about your nicknames….. What´s BR”Mutter”?

  6. Arneyb says:

    Best Regards… That s not the nickname. “Mutter” that is quite a long story. But it fits to my way of caretaking for my friends and my peacefulness even on track.

  7. batistuda says:

    Congratulations on the cup!!! Fantastic!!!
    Yes once again I was getting sweating hands (of fear to be honest!!!) while reading your post. Its so well done.
    I love the last two pictures, especially the one of the “Steilstrecke”. (And of course the other ones too!!)

  8. AlexM says:

    I’ve never had such bad days at Nuerburgring as the last Scuderia.
    As more, the show of the “Dancing Queen” was very impressive!
    In autum we’ll have five days of great sun and the evil world will strike back:-)
    I have to salut for your result.

    AlexM

  9. @batistuda. you will have to come and see for yourself: Steilstrecke is an outragous bit of Ex-track.
    @ in autumn we´ll probably have rain and tons of fun again……..

  10. Dominik says:

    Mrs. Spangenberg,
    great driving, great pictures and great story…

    Michel V.

  11. Arneyb says:

    hmmm:
    so for her Nicknames we have “Dancing Queen”, “G-Spot Spangenberg” and “Steilstrecke” ?
    So Gaby, any other proposals, before we vote for Your nickname ?

  12. batistuda says:

    Dancing Queen, Dancing Queen, Dancing Queen!!!!!!
    I wasn’t asked……but dancing queen, dancing queen, dancing queen!!!

  13. Nobody was asked here! And looking at your choices it´s obvious why. Cruelly uncovering my dreadful music taste, batistuda….

  14. Anonymous says:

    along the lines of m*a*s*h’s lady major, how about “hot curbs”!?

    hopin to hear your story soon mutter.

    take care,
    ben

  15. Arneyb says:

    aah ! Another name in the line. I think we we wait till the next two or three blogs and then we will make another election. Mrs Spangenberg is kindly invited to send us some additional name-proposals to avoid being called “G-Spot” in the future
    ;-)

  16. mealsandwheels says:

    Mrs. Spangenberg has not kindly invited any more nicknames! “Hot curbs”…!Mr. Ben what kind of track are you rolling on?

  17. Sandra says:

    To the mère sauvage: Where is the trophy? I want to see it.

  18. Anonymous says:

    Congratulations! Very nice post! And nice driving too! Send me an email to das_postfach@web.de please, got some nice photos of your car…
    Best Regards Eric, Group 9

  19. Anonymous says:

    I will not call you “Hot Curbs”
    I will not do anything bad ever again.
    I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.
    I will not get very far with this attitude.
    I will remember to take my medication.

    ben

  20. Dear Sandra: I will post it next time. It seemed so braggish to show it…
    Dear Eric: I will send an email NOW! Looking forward to receiving your pictures!
    Dear Ben: So happy to hear you will take your medication from now on. but please don´t stop your amusing comments!!!!

  21. Arneyb says:

    Yummy
    but while reading about the delicious food and thinking about the romantic country I couldnt avoid thinking about destroying this athmosphere by turning the ignition key of an old and loud 911, giving it some spice and rocking thering…
    After dinner of course

Leave a Comment